Anaconda (2025)

​“Anaconda” stars Jack Black, Paul Rudd, Steve Zahn, Thandiwe Newton, Daniela Melchior, and Selton Mello.  Released on December 25, 2025, the film follows a group of friends who remake their favorite childhood movie in the jungle.

The film was directed by Tom Gormican, who also directed “That Awkward Moment” and “The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent”.  It is the sixth installment in the Anaconda film series and serves as a meta-reboot of Luis Llosa’s 1997 film.  Many of us have favorite childhood movies we love to watch.  Whether they are well-received or fall into the “so-bad-it’s-good” category, these movies shape our early years in more ways than one, and maybe even inspire us with their filmmaking.  Personally, I’m someone who grew up living and breathing anything Disney-related.  There are also some people who love their childhood movies so much that they’re willing to remake them in their own image, including one that they’re dying to make.  That is, if it doesn’t kill them first.  The film I’m referring to is the 1997 cult classic “Anaconda”, which involves Jennifer Lopez and Ice Cube battling a massive snake in the Amazon.  Despite mixed reviews, the film became a favorite among creature-feature fans for its creepily absurd premise and scaly antagonist.  As a result, it spawned a few sequels and a crossover movie with “Lake Placid,” which bit off more than it could swallow in terms of cheesiness.  However, that didn’t stop this dangerous serpent from slithering back on the big screen, with a reboot that aims to deliver a “meta” approach to the franchise’s B-movie roots.  With Jack Black and Paul Rudd now battling the deadly snake in the woods, does this fresh direction help breathe new life into the horror franchise, or should audiences slither away and seek other holiday options?  Let’s head back into the Amazon and find out.

The story follows four childhood friends: Doug McCallister (Black), Ronald “Griff” Griffin (Rudd), Kenny Trent (Zahn), and Claire Simons (Newton), who share the same love for their favorite film, “Anaconda”.  As they grow older, they find themselves unsatisfied with how their current lives have turned out.  Everything changes when Griff manages to acquire the rights to “Anaconda”, leading them to do the unthinkable: make a low-budget indie version of the film in the Amazon Rainforest.  However, their movie unexpectedly becomes real when the friends find themselves confronting an actual anaconda in the rainforest.  As a result, they’re pitted in a thrilling fight for survival against a gigantic snake with a voracious appetite.

I’ve only seen bits and pieces of the original “Anaconda”, which was released when I was too young for teen-rated movies.  Nevertheless, I was interested in seeing this latest entry in the creature-feature franchise, and it’s not just because of Paul Rudd and Jack Black.  Rather than rebooting it with the same ingredients as the original, this version of “Anaconda” takes a “Tropic Thunder” route by satirizing Hollywood’s obsession with IPs and remakes.  While it maintains the terror of being chased by a giant snake, this reboot leans more into its comedic and cheesy aspects through its meta humor.  It somehow reminds me of how the recent “Jumanji” installments transitioned from a board game to a video game.  The concept was familiar yet introduced fresh ideas to make the IP more fresh and fun.  Personally, I see no issue with them attempting to provide something new to an existing IP as long as they execute it well and craft a compelling story to complement it.  However, sometimes these new ideas may wind up biting them in the butt, unintentionally angering their fans if they’re not careful, with “Star Wars” being the prime example.  

In the case of “Anaconda”, the concept’s meta humor serves as a harmless yet amusing reinvention of the horror franchise.  However, when it comes to its execution, it doesn’t quite squeeze out as much potential of its satire as it should have.  It offers ample enjoyment through the characters rebooting “Anaconda” indie-style, mixing jokes about IP reboots with them being chased by a humongous serpent.  But when it decides to weave in the horror elements the franchise is renowned for, the meta-reboot finds itself in a tonal clash that lacks a cohesive vision.  In other words, this version of “Anaconda” is more of a typical action comedy than its previous installments, for better or worse.  Those seeking the straightforward creature horror that 1997’s “Anaconda” traditionally offers might find this rendition lacking in suspense and fright, as it lacks the precise balance between its humorously cheesy undertones and the expected thrills.

Granted, director Tom Gormican isn’t exactly the right fit to display the film’s horror aspects.  However, what he does succeed in is satirizing Hollywood’s tendencies.  Gormican’s previous film, “The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent”, showcased the filmmaker’s ability to poke fun at Hollywood’s modern standards while delivering an entertaining story.  Plus, you can’t go wrong with Nicolas Cage being his unhinged self.  With “Anaconda”, Gormican and his collaborator from “Massive Talent”, Kevin Etten, set their sights on constricting Hollywood’s obsession with rebooting IPs.  Whether by following the same structure or revitalizing some familiar ideas, there’s no doubt that Hollywood loves to revisit popular franchises for a new generation, often at the cost of originality.  “Anaconda” offers an honest, even humorous look at the current state of Hollywood.  The problem is that it doesn’t actually showcase its satire enough.  

Amid its meta humor and edgy jokes, “Anaconda” plays out similarly to its previous installments and other creature features in terms of narrative structure.  It presents a straightforward, albeit somewhat unbalanced, comedy involving childhood friends striving to improve their lives by realizing their dreams, all while avoiding becoming the snake’s all-you-can-eat buffet.  Some of its formulaic genre elements and an underwhelming first half resulted in Gormican and Etten’s script struggling to match the same bite as their meta-endeavor featuring Nicolas Cage.  But at the very least, the film retained the entertainment value of its satirical premise, even if not all its jokes land effectively.  Speaking as someone who enjoys watching movies, I found some of the humor involving IPs to be pretty amusing and relatable.  I wouldn’t say they were hilariously memorable, but some of them were sufficient to overlook a few crude jokes in between and even keep me from abandoning this boat ride.  Unfortunately, I felt like most of the time it didn’t really fully capitalize on its meta potential, relying more on the franchise’s established formula.  Admittedly, I had a solid time with the structure we’ve seen before, notably through its entertaining yet silly second half.  But given our perspectives on today’s filmmaking traditions, I feel like this could’ve been something special if it had put greater emphasis on that aspect.

Along with its entertainment value and meta humor, “Anaconda” benefited from its cast, especially Paul Rudd and Jack Black.  Understandably, having these two actors in a horror franchise like “Anaconda” was downright bizarre, given their roles in comedies.  Then again, the 1997 film has Jennifer Lopez and Ice Cube battling a snake, so I can’t really argue with how the franchise chooses its meals…I mean actors.  Thankfully, instead of hampering the film with their presences, Rudd and Black made the most of their comedic traits and chemistry to complement its meta flair.  Unsurprisingly, Jack Black plays to his usual strengths in his trademark humor regarding his role as Doug, and while his performance isn’t his best, I think it works better here compared to him in “A Minecraft Movie”.  Black retains the charm from his earlier roles to convey Doug’s generous yet sometimes overambitious persona, but he also ensured that his exaggeration didn’t come off as tediously irritating.  Paul Rudd also did a solid job as Griff, a background actor seeking to turn his career around with his most daring role yet.  Steven Zahn also delivered some humorously dumb moments as Kenny, while Daniela Melchior aligned well with the film’s tone as Ana, a woman hunted by illegal gold miners.  As for the visuals, they’re okay at best, particularly for the giant anaconda.  At times, I can easily tell that it’s CGI, but fortunately, they’re not to the point of being insulting to my eyes.

Overall, “Anaconda” isn’t able to squeeze out its meta-humor essence effectively, but it finds some breathing room to slither into “enjoyable” territory.  Tom Gormican and co-writer Kevin Etten offer a more comical take on the 1997 cult classic that’s absurd enough to be considered a harmless, but tonally flawed, afternoon watch.  Unfortunately, fans hoping for the horror elements of the franchise’s earlier installments may find themselves waiting to be choked to death due to its subpar scares and unimpressive kills.  The satirical approach to IP reboots does add a refreshing twist to the franchise’s usual formula, but it often gets overshadowed by the very concept it critiques, diminishing the film’s entertainment value by a small bit.  Paul Rudd and Jack Black make for a charming comedy duo regarding their chemistry, and the second half was fun enough to excuse its shaky first half.  However, as a movie that takes a huge bite on Hollywood’s obsession with reboots, it doesn’t have the sharpest fangs to chew its way through the forest of missed opportunities.  It doesn’t reach the meta heights of Gormican’s “Massive Talent”, leaving audiences less eager to revisit the rainforest.  Nonetheless, those in search of harmless entertainment would likely find some merit in confronting this cinematic serpent once more.

C